Don & Marcie

Connected and Transformed
February 14, 2010

Jesus goes up on the mountain top and has a life changing experience.  The experience was not without risks as Jesus becomes totally vulnerable and exposed to everyone around him, there is no hiding his divinity.  The Son of Man speaks to Moses and Elijah.   His physical appearance changes as the finite meets the infinite.  What a scene that must have been.

Our human changes are not always like that.  Sometimes they are huge and we, like the sleepy disciples may miss the significance when it happens.

I would like to share with you a little bit about my week and like almost any week it has a fascinating tie to our gospel lesson and this week the entire theme of our readings.

Monday… we moved

Finally the last things come back home from our wilderness journey.  Things we did not know we owned things we never thought we would ever see again or frankly ever wanted to see again in some cases.  Unloading and reloading, lugging and dragging St. David’s…all of our stuff was home again.

In the midst of that I had a little moving of my own, my parents buffet and dining room table were moved from our storage area to our home.  I can hardly look upon that old table without getting just a little misty eyed.  Christmas, Thanksgiving, Birthdays, Parties.  Days of great joy, High School graduation and after funeral gatherings all celebrated around that old table.  Every loved one of my childhood, most of whom are long departed, sat around that table and now it is in a dining room again.

Monday afternoon and night I joined with Richard Stuckey and his family as they gathered around Lucy during her final hours.  The whole family sang hymns and gathered around her, ending the church hymns with a rousing version of Elvira complete with the doo whaps, mow mows and giddy-ups.   Changes in life.

The Monthly Ministry Night on Wednesday proved more exciting than usual.  Earlier in the day a trouble or supervisory alarm showed that a sensor had detected smoke in the area of an exhaust fan in the kitchen.  So began a saga that ended during Ministry Night with smoke in the parish hall and fire trucks visiting St. David’s.

We learned a great deal about our building such as when such an alarm sounds, it shuts down the heat and unlocks the office outside door.  By Thursday morning a fan belt was replaced on the exhaust fan and all was well.  Change often reminds you of things past.

We celebrated Lucy’s funeral, the first in our new building on Friday morning and we will miss her very much.  Change!

Friday night and Saturday your new Vestry met in retreat at the Sophia Center at Mount Saint Scholastica in Atchison.  The Benedictine Sisters are wonderful hosts and we joined with them in the Monastery Dining Hall and Choir Chapel for meals and prayers.  On Friday evening we met with our new Canon to the Ordinary Craig Loya.  Craig is a very talented priest and I have no doubt will be a major leader in this church, he was also 9 years old when I was ordained a priest.  Change!  I had a chance to spend some of the sisters who know Marcie better than I because of her relationship as an Oblate and former employee at the Mount.  Change!

Each Vestry has a personality, characteristics that are unique to it.  This marks my 23^rd Vestry and I think this year’s edition will be a great one.   Change!

Last night Kevin and Heather were married and our building was the host for a wedding reception.  The Parish Hall looked beautiful decorated for the Valentine’s Day, love was in the air as two families become one.  Hundreds of people gathered to wish the couple happiness, and many compliments were received.  It was not that long ago that our building could not have supported such an event.

God is with us every day of our lives.  God is with us when we have those huge monumental changes that leave us gasping for air or melancholy.  God is with us in the little changes that later on keep us aware of how truly dependent we are on God and each other.

The Transfiguration reminds us to be open to God’s presence and God’s call to change, and that neither the church nor each of us were ever meant to be static and unmoving.  We all grow as we change and each change gives us more opportunities not less.

Hear again words from our reading this morning from Corinthians:

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And all of us, with unveiled faces, seeing the glory of the Lord as though reflected in a mirror, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another; for this comes from the Lord, the Spirit.

Celebrating the Marriage of Kevin and Heather
Lowman United Methodist Church, February 13, 2010

One of the more overused words among younger folks today is the word Awesome. It has nearly the same meaning as Awful, meaning full of awe, awestruck. Anything and everything can be awesome, and the word can be said with a variety of intent. For example, something can be “AWESOME” or it might be “awesome” which does not convey the same abundance of enthusiasm.

Why talk about this word, this awesome word, as we gather to celebrate the wedding of Heather and Kevin, because this is an awesome occasion for two pretty awesome folks made possible by an awesome God.

Notwithstanding the reduction of vocabulary resulting in the overuse of this word, today is a great day for two people, and four other people, and many others.

In a very short amount of time, Kevin and Heather will be the parents of teenagers who will no doubt come up with a really neato groovy bad narley word that will be the bees knees in their generation. They will develop tastes, words, attitudes, expressions and ideas that will stretch their parents and cause them to question, if only for a moment, God’s wisdom in giving them children in the first place.

You see on this awesome day, Kevin and Heather are getting married but that is not the only thing that is happening here. Two families, four children and pets, not to mention Uncles and Aunts, and Grandparents are being brought together and asked to become a family.

This union brings together different people with individual tastes and personalities who will soon begin the transition into a single household. Not an easy task.

So, as a non-parent without siblings, let me give you my hope in three distinct words:

The First Word is “Honesty.” There is no escaping the reality that your task ahead will have moments of dignified and less dignified frustration. Be honest with each other and be honest to those who love you. We all know that what you are going to be doing will take time, compassion and a good sense of humor. Secrets make people sick, and I say to the Logan, Shawn, Ashley and Rachael too… be honest with your parents.

The Second Word is “Respect.” Our Lord made all of us and it takes all of us. We are made in God’s image and likeness and as such we can only imagine God when we seek to fully know each other. Knowing, means respecting who God made us to be. Being made in God’s image means that change, especially drastic change is difficult and takes time and patience.

The Third Word tonight is “Love.” Love is not always romantic, nor is it always beautiful. Love is recognizing the need of another equally if not superior to one’s own need. Love is a basic need for human beings without it we are nothing but a self contained eating and breathing machine. It is love that gives us the ability to find our own voice, and by the end of our days grow into the person God has made us. Love never holds on so tight as to suffocate or so loose that doubt enters. Love allows space for breathing and beliefs, tastes and talents. Love is present when frowns become smiles and the other way around.

With Honesty, Respect and Love, your relationship with each other and the relationships you forge as a new family will grow. Like any living organism this new family will need to be nourished and cared for with lots of empathy, kindness a few compromises and the occasional chocolate chip cookie. God commands us to be honest, calls us to respect and is the very being of Love.

Tonight you give birth to this new entity surrounded by those who love you most, and blessed by our Savior Jesus.

May the light and warmth of this night stay with you, burn within you and keep you all the days of your life. Now that is truly what I call Awesome!

Amen

A homily celebrating the life of Lucy A. Stuckey
February 12, 2010

When we say or think the word “Independence” our minds usually present a picture from the late 18^th century with men in rag tag uniforms fighting the King’s Army near Boston, or Wilmington or some such place.  We might think of a hostage that is released or even more recently of people who find life again after being buried in rubble after a tragic earthquake.

As teenagers we are told to be patient in our drive for independence and emancipation from our parents control, we rebel and rebel and possibly rebel again until the time comes we discover than independence is not as wonderful as we had thought.  Taking charge of our self means that we are also accountable for our self and somehow that reality never sinks in until the time comes when being accountable is not a lot of fun.

Within the context of our Gospel reading where Jesus has a debate with Martha, we come today to celebrate the life of one who understood what independence was all about.  From the moment I met Lucy, I knew she was a woman of great depth, and determination.  Lucy knew Lucy, she knew who she was and who she wasn’t and therefore she projected a confidence and a sense of “who is in charge” and that was clear.

How do Lucy and Martha connect?  They loved their family and their family came first.  Lazarus, Martha and Mary are siblings and Jesus is a cousin.  When Lucy spoke of her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren she glowed.  She might well give each of them “advice” on things, but her sense of love for them was just as obvious as her legendary stubbornness.

Richard and Lucy found each other when they needed each other, and in so doing brought wholeness to their lives and to the lives of their children.   They found a respect for each other that carried them through 53 years of marriage.

When Jesus found Lazarus he wept because he loved him.  Human beings mourn and weep and wonder.  We analyze and hope, reflect and fidget, and sometimes second guess ourselves.  Jesus, who also had a great confidence about him, knew that death is a transition along a journey that brings us to a place where there is no pain but only joy.  “Did I not tell you” Jesus says “that if you believed, you would see the glory of God.”

I wish I could dry every tear and take away the pain in the hearts of those gathered this day, but what I can bring is the comfort of knowing and believing that Lucy is no longer confronted by disease and pain, but alive and free, she is independent of time and earth, of age and sorrow.  She has reached the place of real freedom for she is alive in Christ our Lord.

After Lazarus came out, and after all the arguing was finished, Jesus uttered the words that we must hear this day:  “Unbind him, Let him go.”

Thank you Lord for giving us Lucy, a truly independent and amazing person. We thank you for her sparkle, his sense of humor, her ornery streak a mile wide and her joy.  Thank you for giving us a model of human perseverance.  Now Lord, as difficult as it is for all of us, it is time that she is free in the boundless reality of your heavenly kingdom.

Amen.

As most everyone knows I may be a “Father” but I am not a “Dad.”   For a number of years this felt like failure, especially as I watched my friends from High School and College become parents and now Grandparents.  I was never sure that the world was ready for a little version of me running around, so I convinced myself that I was better off without the worry and expense of children.  One of my favorite sayings when people ask if I have children has been:  “Well at least when I hear a kid down the hall screaming his ever-living head off I know its not mine.”

Mom with Paisley (left) and Lilly.

A couple of things have happened recently that have reawakened this topic after a long sleep.  Obviously, Marcie and I are much too old to even entertain the idea so it is not that.

My late Aunt’s Grandson and his wife have recently given birth to twins.  To see my Mother, their great-great-Aunt holding two two-week old girls was an overwhelming experience.  No, not my children, but I enjoyed the moment as if I were an Uncle instead of a cousin.  Paisley and Lilly will grow up to know that they are loved by their parents, Grandparents and a host of others that are no longer a part of their world.  They will know that God did not stop creating after seven days and a mythical garden, but as kept right on and expects us to do the same.

My thanks to Nick and Toni for allowing us to visit them and the two new additions to their family, and ours, and Gods.